Thursday, December 15, 2011

Knee Deep on Aloha Friday

2nd favorite pic from my vacation.
What would you do if you had one day left on Earth?  This is one of my least favorite hypothetical questions.  The answer to this question is inevitably something you haven't done, wish you'd done, or regret that you haven't done already.  None of these thoughts are particularly pleasant and usually lead to the mass consumption of junk food, booze, or daytime television (depending on how a person deals with brief bouts of depression).  I thought about this hypothetical while trying to decide what I should do on my last day in Hawaii.  Then, in pretty predictable fashion, I stumbled through a pretty uneventful day that I thoroughly enjoyed.

Everybody has those movies that they see on cable and have to stop down to watch no matter the situation.  Anyone who knows me knows that if Teen Wolf is on tv, I'm probably in for the duration.  Teen Wolf was on tv that Friday.  So, after sleeping til around 7 (my latest sleep of the trip), I sat on my friend's couch and watched a movie I've seen roughly a million times, with a phenomenal mountain/sunrise Hawaiian view just to my right.  Winnnnn In The End

Similar to one of my X-mas purchases.
I got up and made my way to the Alamoana Center to pick up some souvenirs.  The previous sentence is not a typo.  I actually shopped while on vacation.  I hate shopping with all my being.  I've never hunted for a better buy, a slightly nicer pair of shoes, thought it would be fun to look around a new store, etc.  But in this instance, I saw an opportunity to get Christmas shopping out of the way and totally avoid a duplicate-gifting situation.  Anyone who knows my aversion to ordering the same entree as someone else at a restaurant, can probably guess that it's quite the kidney punch when I get somebody a gift they've already received.  So, for the first time ever, the majority of my Christmas shopping was done in early October.  POW, POW!!

I can't divulge any of the gifts I got, because half of the people that read this are related to me, and that would be no fun.  The only purchases I can discuss are for those that can't read (my nephew Riley and nieces Claire and Katherine).  If they have progressed significantly in the last few months and read the ramblings of their Uncle Ben, then they totally deserve the X-mas sneak preview (Wait a minute!  What am I saying?  Sister pull them away from the computer right away!  I mention adult things in this blog, like meth and Hello Kitty)

I found a store that looked pleasant and Hawaiian-gifty enough for holiday purposes.  I was a bit misguided by the store's name, Sand People.  I assumed my shopping experience would go more like this: Sand People.  It was slightly less painful.  I did find the greatest toy shelf in shopping history.  Tons of Hawaiian style toys, puzzles, dolls, books, etc.  I was two seconds away from buying Riley a hippy van model car with a surfboard on the roof, until I saw the price tag.  It was awesome, but not quite that awesome. 


So, after I load up on toys for kids ranging in age from 4-8, I made my way to the register.  I asked the cute shop girl if she could help me out, which she replied "Of course, I can!"  Now, I 'm an idiot when it comes to women.  I will readily admit this.  The subtleties of flirtation are usually lost on me.  That being said, this girl dug me.  Could it be that I was the only dude in the store, and thus the only one who could be manipulated into buying more Sand People products with a well-placed batting of the eyes?  Sure.  But she didn't sell me anything, she only answered one question of mine, and most of our conversation took place after my purchases were already made.  Did anything come of this?  No, but I did learn something.  It is impossible to look like a bad-ass when buying an under-the-sea puzzle, a cloth rainbow fish, a package of rubber duckies, and a curly-haired mermaid doll.  Impossible!  (Note: I bought the mermaid doll nearly a month before my niece dressed like a mermaid for Halloween!  All I do is win, win, win!)

After shopping, I walked down to the water.  The incredible open-air mall that I've previously described in more depth, is within walking distance of Waikiki Beach.  I stepped into the water just to enjoy the ocean one last time on my trip.  Knee Deep  is a fun song by Zac Brown Band that I probably listened to a dozen times on my trip.  Most of the country music on my i-pod seemed out of place on the island, but this song always seemed appropriate.  If you need a visual for my last dip into the ocean, the redneck in the video is close enough to what I looked like at that point.  If you aren't familiar with it, give it a watch/listen."Knee Deep".

I'm gonna write one more blog entry about my last night on the island, to wrap up my trip, and explain Aloha Friday!  I'll try to not wait a month to write the next one.

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